I am so angry (redpill)

[Princess]

Sorry this is just a rant, i was wondering if anyone else felt this way after understanding the reality of men and how they think.

I am so angry because it is like everything i ever believed in my whole life was false. Now that I am understanding more and more of the male nature, I am getting more and more upset because I always believed in this pure concept of love in my head and I was always confused, betrayed and hurt each and every time in relationships with men and I always thought it was my fault but the more I understand about men, the more I realized it’s because they never wanted the same thing I wanted, the innocent pure kind of love I had in my head. My worth to them was amounted in my looks and what I could provide for them. I am so angry that I blindly believed in this stupid notion of love for ages because of the stupid movies, books and propaganda, it just feels like pointless now because all my life I just thought if I tried hard enough or looked hard enough I would find what I wanted but in reality, guys just want a pornstar that cooks and cleans. They don’t know even KNOW what love is. I feel like I took the redpill, but of course the redpill for guys is so stupid, they are upset that some Stacey isn’t worshipping their dick and would dump them for a richer and hotter guy even though their “love” for her is completely shallow so the relationship should be transactional in the first place. Maybe i am being too harsh on guys, i dont know. Maybe I am delusional. But i just can’t stop feeling like the world just fell down and everything came apart because all I ever wanted was to find one guy and just settle down with him and love him and give him all the love in the world, and now i feel so stupid, i don’t know how to stop feeling so sad.

 

[Princess]

It took me a long time to come to terms with everything you just wrote. I have a daughter and will be teaching her these things early. Luckily, she doesn’t like Disney princess movies, so I won’t have that to combat. If I had known the nature of men when I was growing up, it would have saved me so much heartache and pain along the way getting to this point in my life.
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Thank you for making me feel like i am not crAzy for feeling this way

 

[Princess]

I felt just like this. I went through a phase that was about 1 year long where I just hated men. I hated all of them. I considered even becoming a lesbian because the idea of spending life with a man made me so angry. Haha. But now I've just settled into acceptance mode. I have accepted that men are different from us. They put aside emotions so they can manipulate women for what they want so I have no problem using them either and cutting them off when they no longer benefit me. I encourage every woman to do the same.

When it comes to relationships, telling women that men and women are exactly the same when dating is not just misleading but also damaging.
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This makes me feel better as I felt I was going on for too long, hoping to reach acceptance soon!

 

[Princess]

Jedi hugs if you want them. Pre-FDS, part of me believed all men were like that and I had to just work to settle and be happy with crumbs. You're describing LVM, who are everywhere. You're not alone. Hold out for someone who values what you value and cheers when you are thriving <3
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Im with you and no youre not delusional.We are fed up.Its truly painful when the reality of it all hits you.Like you said everything we thought we knew about love was a lie .To me, Its one big fairytale that i just dont believe in anymore.All i wanted was to find that hvm who loves and values me and have a family.But thats something im setting aside for my sanity's sake.Im trying my hardest not to beat myself up about it all.

 

[Princess]

Hey, I understand. I felt the same way when I first started figuring out what's behind abusive male behaviors.

They don’t know even KNOW what love is.

The scary part is that I think they do know what love is, but they prefer to keep amassing power over women. Being controlling is more appealing than being loving. Being loving would require harnessing their egos and being emotionally vulnerable, which most of them aren't willing to do. That's the tragedy of all of this. And I know there is supposed to be no excessive male sympathizing on this sub, but it's tragic for them too because they're missing out on a fundamental human experience that makes us all grow as people. Their choice to be cowards, of course.

all I ever wanted was to find one guy and just settle down with him and love him and give him all the love in the world

It's not wrong to want this. There are a few men who want this too, I think. The problem with this desire is that it relies on another person. It's all dependent on you meeting the right person at the right time. You have a limited amount of control over that. That's why it's better to pretend there's no such thing a dating, do all the things you want to do yourself, and then if a great relationship happens, it happens.

To use myself as an example, I've been mostly single for three years. During those three years, I have learned some Japanese, traveled to nine countries by myself, learned the basics of computer programming (which I'm still working on), built up my 401k a lot, and learned how to cook really good Chinese food. I've also made some fantastic new friends that I love to cook with and play board games with. And I'm going to continue, and that pattern just may continue until I die, with me enjoying life as a single person. I know that I'm a lot happier than a lot of people in relationships, and I'm certainly happier than a lot of women who are obsessed with men. (Don't get me wrong - I have those moments too, but I try to limit them.) I highly recommend this to all women as a lifestyle choice.

 

[Princess]

I'm angry sometimes too. I'm 39 and have never dated an emotionally intelligent man or one that truly loved me for me and did thoughtful things for me without being nagged. Even if I did have one with "potential", he was too mentally disordered to stay with. I've had several batshit crazy ones.

And I'm raising a son. And I'm watching him be as selfish and uncaring of other's feelings as grown up men seem to be. At first I thought all children are selfish and he would grow out of it with me helping him, but it is honestly a battle. He's so lazy and self centered even though he clearly has tons of empathy. He's still young and is just starting to get self awareness and be someone I can hold conversations with, so I'm praying my influence will do him some good. I constantly call him out on shit. I have him reflect on the kind of dad he has and the kind of mom he has. And y'all, little boys really do love their mothers. He tells me literally all day and verbalizes how he wished I had more than 50% custody, but he's so so selfish. Hopefully this sub is still killing it in a few years and I can say what a well adjusted high value man I am raising. I'm trying haha.

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I feel your pain. I have a 10 yo boy and it's like pulling teeth. At his age I was cooking and babysitting, but he rolls his eyes like a drama clean when I remind him to do his daily chores. The laziness is truly profound.

 

[Princess]

How do you deal with the rage ? (Redpill)

Two years ago, in the aftermath of a break-up, desperately trying to figure out what exactly had happened to me, I discovered TRP. I went straight down the grimiest rabbit hole you can imagine, became OBSESSED with reading everything TRP/PUA/MGTOW. I was enraged, sickened to the point of...

fdsforum.com

I'm in the same boat :/
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I understood every word of what you wrote. I have no answers, other than to advise you to have compassion for yourself. These sociopaths no longer hold any power over you. You’re free of them if you decide that you’re free.

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We were all raised on lies.

Disney, Hollywood, romance novels, religion, and even Instagram. All of these places are full of artificial love and artificial partnerships, and depict men who don't exist. It warps our views as children, falsely believing we will be treated well by a man someday, that love and respect from men is possible without lying to oneself, and that society is fair.

Men want objects. Men lie to get anything they want. Very few men see us as human beings. We've been deceived by our own families into believing that the men we know are good people. They aren't. They are the reason why women's most likely cause of death is not illness but murder -- and that is the case the world over regardless of first world or third world rich or poor.

Imho men should be exterminated off the face of the earth and used only for reproductive purposes.

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don't beat yourself up too much, it's very difficult to NOT believe those things because of societal pressure. I only ever discovered most of the things we discuss in this sub because I've been political and a feminist since I was about 10 years old, it's nearly impossible not to absorb those messages. Which is why this sub is a Godsend

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It's alright, you need a little time to process. It's a good thing to see things more clearly. Take your time, be angry and sad and then let go, and get to work to make what you want happen.

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I was upset at first too. Takes a while to come to terms with it

 

[Princess]

I know it’s not much help since I’m new to FDS and still inexperienced with dating in general, but I would at least be grateful that you found out men’s true nature now, then later when you’re committed/married to a LVM who is abusive and dismissive towards you and waste even more years of your life.

I too have seen RP posts about women and dehumanizing us and only seeing us as sexual objects. I’m in my mid twenties now and it disgusts me how they disregard older women and prey upon women in their late teens and early twenties. All I can say is thank god for FDS and their advice.

I would use that hatred and disgust towards improving yourself and raising your standards. We can’t change the past but we can definitely change the future. Use those experiences you had with men and keep that in mind when you start dating again. It says more about them then you when they see women as sex objects.

I know it’s not much but work on yourself and make yourself a priority above all else.

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I think it's not as black and white fortunately, but men are very egoistic. However, they can feel love the same way as we do. There are men who fall in love, and the strategies you get from this site will help you to get them interested in a way where deep emotion can grow. I know that my partner thinks of me similarly to how i think of them because they miss me at the same times and often think in similar patterns (just to name a few).

When you start off thinking the worst about men, yet knowing that the right method might bring out the best of them, you'll get to experience the good of men given enough time. Humans generally act in surprisingly bad or kind ways depending on how you manipulate them so it only makes sense. It's just sad just how many men act and think like complete ruthless babies.

It gets better from here so long as you can make sure judt a little part of you stays hopeful and romantic! But like, a small part. Like 5%-10% of you

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Harsh horrible realisations do this to us, but I have this belief that when something is realised and you become enlightened to the truth, this is when you can transform yourself. I have been feeling the same as you, and it has made me so angry I can hardly cope with it. But I also remember, everytime I have felt this type of anger, after wading through it, my life has improved. See it this way, no more will you accept men that neg you, play games with you and treat you like you are not human. This is a bonus for you! Because it either makes way for one of those rare HVM, or being single but free of all of the hell and bullshit from the majority of men. It's a win for you, me and all the other wonderful women on here. Terrible realisations improve life in the long run

 

[Princess]

Can they love one woman forever

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I believe that they can, personally. Most of the men in my family have stayed with their wives and been faithful, are caring and considerate towards them. Not that they didn't have their issues, but they absolutely value their wives and treat them that way.

Men in their early twenties are a writeoff though. And some guys never grow out of that phase.

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Yeah, it's very rare for both sexes to never change their mind about a person or to be entirely monogamous and staying monogamous requires lots of work in a relationship but they sure can! It's maybe extra rare for men since they're less likely to stay calm by themselves? They often obsess more over women so they'd need to be obsessed about their woman for their entire life, but it's possible. It helps that men can be very proud about staying monogamous and keeping a woman. I know men who personally want to find someone and stay with them forever, and they work to understand how they can achieve this since it's natural to get bored of someone after some time.

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I was going to say that I think men are more capable of obsessing over one woman and being devastated for years when the relationship doesn't work out or god forbid, she dies.

I know some good men. Not many though. I could've had a really good one once, but he was like 15 yrs older than me and had three kids. The wife left them all to start over with her old high school sweetheart. None of the kids will have anything to do with her because she moved from the east coast to the west coast and just abandoned them. And he really seemed to be an incredible, involved father who was also the main breadwinner. He's happy again and the kids are all grown. I ramble lol. But he was interested in me and I just couldn't do the age gap even though he was adorable.