How do you deal with the rage ? (Redpill)

[Princess]

Two years ago, in the aftermath of a break-up, desperately trying to figure out what exactly had happened to me, I discovered TRP. I went straight down the grimiest rabbit hole you can imagine, became OBSESSED with reading everything TRP/PUA/MGTOW.

I was enraged, sickened to the point of throwing up several times.

I was horrified to realize that men I had been with premeditated to "Pump and Dump" me, which they had predicated on fraud. I consider that intention they held to be sexually violent and predatory.

I feel that they just wanted to passively rape someone, and they found a way to do just that. Intent is 100%, and their intentions where fucking sociopathic, insidious, covert and sexually violent.

Personal accountability is important, and I am not denying that I was naive, but I am really struggling with this. I feel that they took something precious from me. I want it back.

I have not felt sexual desire or attraction since I discovered TRP and realized what had been done to me. Discovered that most men view sex as a disgusting psychotic form of conquest/domination and soul/energy harvesting.

Has anyone else struggled with this feeling of sexual violation? With this rage?

I feel trapped, I am 27 and have been celibate for two years. I no longer speak to or interact with men irl.

Have I allowed myself to be brainwashed by the very thing I hate? Have I spent too long in RP/PUA forums and allowed myself to absorb that shame? I do not want to feel like some sociopath that emotionally and psychologically manipulated/coerced me into sexual conquest is out there thinking/feeling like he has some sexual ownership over me, my past self.

I literally cannot move past this. I understand how insane this sounds. I want to move on, but I feel a rage inside of me that feels like it could swallow me whole at times. How dare they do these things? And then frame US as the crazy ones?

Please help if you have any advice as to how I reprogram/reframe my perception of these events.

 

[Princess]

I know it’s not much help since I’m new to FDS and still inexperienced with dating in general, but I would at least be grateful that you found out men’s true nature now, then later when you’re committed/married to a LVM who is abusive and dismissive towards you and waste even more years of your life.

I too have seen RP posts about women and dehumanizing us and only seeing us as sexual objects. I’m in my mid twenties now and it disgusts me how they disregard older women and prey upon women in their late teens and early twenties. All I can say is thank god for FDS and their advice.

I would use that hatred and disgust towards improving yourself and raising your standards. We can’t change the past but we can definitely change the future. Use those experiences you had with men and keep that in mind when you start dating again. It says more about them then you when they see women as sex objects.

I know it’s not much but work on yourself and make yourself a priority above all else.